Being Tyler Brûlé

The Embraer 145 had just left the hot tarmac of Sabiha Gökçen and we were admiring the Bosphorus over a glass of Krug. It was one of those days. But rather than put the finishing touches on the weekly column, we decided that it was time to move on.

Looking back, it had been a smooth 30 000 ft ride. The Independent thought that we lampooned TB. New York Times wrote that we “aped his global galavantings”. In an interview in Portfolio, the man himself described us as simply “odd”. That’s what you get for flying Lufthansa instead of JAL on pan-asian routes.

So that was it for this time. Our glasses of Krug were beginning to look worryingly empty (the inflight glassware on this beauty is awfully small). We’ll see you all in the Frankfurt lounge, waiting for the Cayenne to pick us up to our next destination. Thanks.

As much as we love the screeching sound of the tires touching down at Haneda, as equally hard it is to feel them lift off again. You simply cannot get enough of Nippon.

To try to make up for the lack of izakayas, ubiquitous Maglev transportation, and the whispering of “irasshaimase” everywhere, we have made a short guide to the three best places to get your Japan fix – outside of the Land of the Rising Sun itself.

1. Kinokuniya, Bryant Park, New York
Yes – they are all over the states, and no – it’s not the same as the one between Shinjuku and Shinjukunishiguchi. But it is good enough to pick up some Takehiko Inoue, and what’s more – there is a NTT Docomo counter downstairs.

2. Toraya, Japantown, San Francisco
Apart from the katsudon being absolutely oishii, you should try to get your hands on some Kuromaguro (or Honmaguro, if you will). One bite and you’ll be back at that charming Mimasuya in Chiyoda-ku in no time. Pop into Ichiban Kan for something kawaii on your way out.

3. Japanshop, Neustadt, Berlin
An ambitious nippon excursion, far from the German strictness of Mitte. Stepping in through the door and hearing Eiko Yamashita is a good sign, no matter where you are. But seeing that they have the full lineup of Hana-Kimi by Hisaya Nakajo makes you want to stay all afternoon.

The struggling French carrier Air France have just introduced a new “premium voyageur” seating class:

With Premium Voyageur, you will enjoy:

– 40% additional space: on average, 22 Premium Voyageur seats will be available over an area which before held 40 Economy class seats; this translates to very generous legroom.
– A completely new seat: equipped with a fixed shell which guarantees passengers’ space and privacy. You will also enjoy an extra large tray table and a leg rest.
– A wide individual video screen: enjoy hours of video on demand.
– Amenities from the Affaires (Business Class) cabin: travel kit, noise-reducing headphones, a feather pillow, pure new wool blanket.

Seat and amenity innovation is an area that is often overseen by airlines (not to mention international award shows). This should therefore be encouraged. In theory. But where is the innovation in taking the amenities from Affaires and adding seats with less space than in the front?

There’s a perfectly good place to sit in aeroplanes, and that means turning left when boarding. We see no point in wasting space with an upgraded cattle section.

My Lufthansa experience the other day was anything but TBI 100. Although I appreciate the proper cabin uniforms and the charming Mid-European accents, I would also like to add some service from the more well mannered parts of our flight origin. As my Star Alliance points regrettably belonged to another programme than Miles & More, I was treated like the rest of the Economy Class cattle – prodded to behave. Surely, there is such a word as ‘flexibility’ in German, recht?

Well on board the A340-600, I enjoyed the redesigned cabin with it’s lighter leather. Easier on the waking eye, I found. But the same awkward correctness showed itself during the service, impairing the experience. It is fine to do things the right way, but sometimes the right thing isn’t what the manual says but what the customer needs.

As you know, we like Lufthansa and they have many fine traits – the black first class service Merc is top notch, for instance. But when you can’t serve Krug with a smile, it doesn’t matter how well designed your timetables are.

When do people travel with their families? Summer time.
What is their main concern? Safety.
So what to write about on a summer sunday? Naturally, the horrors of a dysfunctional cockpit combo.

Lesson to live by: If you can’t understand what the pilot is saying, be sure to put your Oneworld Emerald status to work and board that Cathy Pacific flight bound for Singapore instead. And do it swiftly.

For the last month, I’ve been spending my summer hols in San Francisco. My Med place was getting a refurbishing (Gaggenau oven, Toto toilet, etc), so I thought I´d give it a shot. After all, it is a tech savvy, liberal and generally bikeable place – steep hills aside. Even the public transport works (by North American standards). That being said, the Caltrain station is not exactly Hauptbahnhof in Zürich, if you know what I mean.

However, the city has failed to make any of the Monocle´s lists of liveability. We believe Tyler Brûlé´s response to whether SF was a decent city or not was simply: “God, no!”. Quite. Therefore we feel obliged to point out what has gone so wrong with this seismological little treat on the Pacific.

The list of possible improvements is literally endless, but let’s focus on three main areas:

1. Retail. It’s a nightmare, as is most American cities. Finding an interesting shopping route requires a patient driver, willing to whizz all over the place to get a sufficient itinerary. No Tsutaya´s either, or anything even close to it.

2. City planning. Mayor Newsom may be a celebrity favourite, but a city planner he is not. In certain areas, surprisingly central, a wrong turn on a cross street will send you straight into areas where the locals prefer malt liquor to single malt.

3. Business friendliness. The whole state of California is actually the worst American state to do business in – and has been so for four years running. And even if SF can’t be blamed for the disastrous state of the state, it certainly doesn’t seem to be working especially hard to improve it. Signs of closure are as commonly spotted as 50% sales.

So, is there any hope for San Francisco? Yes. There is a surprising amount of pet oriented stores, especially in the Hayes Valley/Haight districts. Also, to our delight, we found a top pet bakery up on Union Street. We’re glad to see that the notion of canine entrepreneurship is still thriving. If that can’t pull the city and the state out of it’s rut – nothing can.